Frank or Diplomatic: Which is a More Effective Communication Style?
It can’t be both…they are opposite??
Frank is the tendency to be direct and to the point. Diplomatic is the tendency to state things in a tactful manner. These communication styles may appear to be conflicting.
Characteristic polarities, like paradoxes, exist where two ideas or behaviors are both valid yet seem to contradict each other. This can create tension. Often, leaders overuse one to the detriment of the other. They may prefer one approach over the other because they believe that it is the right way to communicate to get results. For instance, look at why these styles are used and how they are received.
Quick view of Frank & Diplomatic choices
Those that prefer to use frankness may:
Want to influence by being direct and clear
View diplomacy as wimpy, weak, and wishy-washy
Fear not being heard
Be perceived as overly blunt, harsh, and cold
Those that prefer to use diplomacy may:
Want harmony
View frankness as rude, uncaring, and cold
Fear conflict, rejection, or hurting feelings
Be perceived as evasive, non-committal, and confusing
The answer is all 3 choices!
Each communication style has value, but also potential pitfalls. Rather than trying to resolve the uncomfortable tension by choosing one style over the other, leaders will be most effective when they develop the capacity to move back and forth between them. According to Dr. Dan Harrison, when a leader can be both frank and diplomatic, they achieve balanced versatility. Being agile with each and flexing to use both of these paradoxical traits in balance is called Forthright Diplomacy. Instead of having only one, why not have three tools in your leadership kit (Frank, Diplomatic, and Forthright Diplomacy)!
Achieve Versatility through Reframing
Taking a moment to rethink your communication style will help you stretch to the lesser used behavior and understand how it can enhance your leadership effectiveness without giving up your goals.
For those that are frank, being more tactful may allow the audience to remain open to hearing your points. This will increase your influence.
For those that are diplomatic, being more direct may help the audience become clearer on your message. This will reduce tension from potential ambiguity and positively impact the interaction.
There is power in the paradox when you know how to harness it!
There are several sets of key work behavior polarities that when used in balanced versatility will increase leadership agility. Identifying and understanding how your leaders are utilizing these is crucial to helping them achieve greater impact for your organization. Let MBM ELEVATE help you understand and harness these paradoxes to accelerate your business results.
Mary Beth Molloy
Certified Executive Coach and Business Consultant, she delivers uncanny focus on the intersection of your business vision and goals and the leaders you’ve entrusted to achieve them.
She knows what it takes to accelerate and elevate business results through leadership development and performance. It’s her powerful blend of these experiences together with her practicality, purpose, and positivity that drive our value.
Mary Beth is interested in hearing from you. | Follow on LinkedIn | Share comments or ask questions
